thinking

i don't think anyone i know reads this anymore - i actually forgot about this blog entirely, until i read kali's post and the setup looked so familiar. she writes about vulnerability and having the courage to pursue a dream, even if that dream isn't fully figured out.

doug and i are jumping into a dream soon that is most definitely not fully figured out. i have spent a good eight hours in our new city and doug has spent none. we head to milwaukee, wisconsin at the end of the month. we leave eugene, oregon and many wonderful places and people on the west coast. as much as i love the massive cedars, peeling madrones, epic mountains, alternative, hippy, hipster foodies, and timber towns of the pacific northwest, it feels okay to go. i'm not even sad. i bet i will be when we start driving, but not just yet. sadness will come, but only later, in the form of nostalgia. and nostalgia is one of my favorite emotions - remembering the past in this deep way, recalling yourself like a now distant friend.

so this dream of milwaukee is not fully formed. but what attracts me about this midwest future is many fold. First of all, i'm going to be doing meaningful work that gets me excited. I'll be working for University of Wisconsin Sea Grant Institute as an environmental economist/sociologist. My primary duties are extension and applied research to assist Great Lakes communities deal with challenges. These challenges are endless, as are the solutions: climate change adaptation, managing the Great Lakes to ensure sufficient water quantity and robust water quality, and sustainable development.

Second Doug and I are getting closer to home. I'm excited to be able to get in my car and be in Columbus for the holidays on a whim. To take the high speed ferry across Lake Michigan and visit with my wonderful friends from Ohio: Melissa, Emily, Stacy, Lauren, Laura, and others. To see Connie in Chicago. And to explore a totally new place. I'm looking forward to kayaking in the boundary waters, checking out the forests of northern Wisconsin, and canoe backpacking in the Upper Peninsula. I've heard there are lots of dog parks in Milwaukee, as well as enough rad people to form a new community.  

I'm obsessed by the idea of sense of place. What does it mean to be somewhere where you are home?

poesía por un perrito

Russell, mi hombre.
Nunca supe como tu presencia cambiara mi vida.
Tanta vida, amor, y diversión que tienes.
No puedo querer más.

Perro contra humano.
Los dos pueden ser cómicas y leales cucharas.
Es que este lab chocolate tiene mi corazón.
Y tomó menos de una semana.

It's time.

It's official. Doug and I are becoming Oregonians on Friday: driver's licenses, car title, and plates, the works. We tried last week but we were rejected due to lack of documents. That's okay, maybe we weren't ready. Ohio and I have a bond based on my midwest identity, practicality, and general bluntness. Oregon and I are a little more like lovers. The rainbows, coast, and forests make me swoon, while the gray skies and rainy days do little for our relationship. The extreme landscape is how I like my lovers: unforgiving, passionate, and real. The plan is to move to Eugene over the summer, even deeper into the Oregon abyss. Being so close to the Umpqua River with time for coastal excursions and snowshoeing adventures may hamper my midwest reunion. While the Ohio community is part of my heart, the idea of community is simultaneously fluid. How many communities can we inhabit through our lifetimes? In this globalized world, the possibilities are endless. I figure that as long as you put your all into where you are in the present, it's okay que será, será.

paths

I just finished reading many of Charlene's posts, which leaves my heart feeling heavier than it did before. I, too, have to realign thought undercurrents to fit in better with societal conversation pitter-patter. I don't have the desire to talk about societal ills so much as ways to combat them. I think that allows me to keep an optimistic outlook, searching out people and ideas that inspire. Success with "activism" ebbs and flows. It's important to reflect on the triumphs to see how they can help re-frame the failures.

Two somewhat distinct paths are laid out for me. My heart is focusing on defining my community as the country, state, and city in which I have lived most of my life and know best. Yet, I still have a penchant for the unknown, particularly the more impoverished unknown. I find myself less driven than Charlene towards human rights struggles in other nations. I do not share their oppression and as much as I can sympathize and feel for their struggle, the amount of time it would take me to integrate myself in such a conflict and the inability to assimilate culturally steers me away from this path.

As for working on economic development in developing countries, I am waffling about this possible destiny as well. I have an opportunity to work for MeryCorps in Nepal this winter. It would be an opportunity to tour the country, learn about their economic development and disaster relief programs, offer advice (advice deemed valid because of my education), and gain some understanding of another culture and people. Through most of my life, I would have jumped at such an opportunity. But, perhaps for the first time, I am hesitant enough to not follow through. Apart from the long, expensive plane ride and missing my family and friends over the holidays, I have ethical qualms about making this journey. The organization would put me up and feed me and bring me in as an "expert" so that they may better their programs with the hope that I would do research on their behalf at a later date.

I have been having a long-running debate with a friend about our morally defensible sphere of influence. He contends that bringing western progressive ideals to a non-western place is no better than multinational corporations and international governmental organizations making their mark on the world. Some might argue that international non-profits are necessary to clean up the original mess of developed country meddling. But might the best solution be getting out of there all together? Even groups that bring seemingly necessary aid such as aids/hiv drugs to Africa and food to famine-stricken countries have an ideology that they are promoting. So, if female genital cutting is being practiced, as a westerner, does my opinion count? I have most often viewed national boundaries with little respect. I see myself as a world citizen. But yet, my world citizen status is incredibly privileged, allowing me to make a much greater impact on people around the globe than I might have had if I grew up in Cambodia. Perhaps I can go to Nepal with the understanding of my privilege and confront and question my authority when the need arises. It's ironic that even though I worry about the negative effects of privilege, I continue to strive for accolades and titles that elevate my status and afford me the most opportunities possible to exercise my beliefs.

lose the jargon - more thoughts

This was going to be a comment on the end of Jane's last post but then I got too long winded (as usual) and decided a new post was the best format.

I have been thinking about this too - specifically when dealing with jargon when hopping from academia to organizing.

My working hypothesis is only use jargon or an uncommon word when:

(1) it articulates an important concept that is not captured in another, simpler word or short phrase. Anything beyond this is jargon that shouldn't exist at all, not in academics and not in daily life.

(2) when it adds a necessary level of complexity to the topic or task at hand. Some jargon does deserve to exist, in that it captures a unique concept, but is rarely appropriate to use outside of academic treatments of a subject. Concepts that are laden with historical and structural detail are probably not worth introducing into a conversation if explaining them is not going to clarify the situation at hand. For example, you probably don't need to bring up orientalism when talking about today's immigration policy with your neighbor.

College educated social justice folks often screw up on both points because they fail to strike a balance. Most obviously they overdo it, using jargon that either shouldn't exist at all, or is innapropriate for the topic at hand.

But I want to focus on the less obvious mistake of underdoing it: dumbing things down so severely - either by censoring all uncommon words or jargon, or by oversimplifying a situation - that we fail to realistically depict the thing we are trying to communicate.

These mistakes can lead to paternalist and populist forms of engaging people. We disrespect folks by talking to them in ways that assumes they are not capable of generating new and more complex thoughts, or assuming they haven't already. We do a disservice to them when we divide the world unrealistically into black and white, knowing there are shades of gray but thinking the best way to motivate others is to be harshly dualistic.

So I think we can use a little bit of jargon when engaging people if we are saavy about it. For example, it is worth making the sex/gender distinction (for those feminists who use it) when talking to a housewife about enrolling her son in gymnastics, or daughter in hockey.

The bottom line is this: the point of using any jargon should be to open up discussion, to clarify or deepen our understanding of a reality. This is in contrast to the example described by Jane, where the competitive graduate student uses it to close down discussion and obscure realities, thereby "winning" a debate or impressing others by virtue of befuddling them.

My only other thought is that we make sure to engage people conversationally, so any goofy words we want to use comes up organically in response to the direction of the conversation. Too often we get into the habit of delivering mini lectures, a holdover from our socialization experience in the university classroom. And as we use any jargon, we should not assume people know what it means. Instead, volunteer to explain any concept as you bring it up, and make sure you have established an environment in which other people know they can feel confortable interupting you to ask for clarification. Let them know that doing so means you are being unclear, rather than that they are revealing ignorance.

lose the jargon

I've been considering how to communicate across disciplines, departments, socio-economic barriers, and cultural identities. I love interdisciplinary non-fiction that challenges a homogenous set of ideas to incorporate a critical analysis of other related concerns. For example, The Journal of Ecological Economics attempts to bridge ecology with economics, which adds depth and dialogue to both disciplines. Or bell hooks describes how the feminist movement must engage African-American women and discard its classist beginnings. We isolate ourselves because it's easier being around those we know, whether we know them by their word choice, skin color, suburban roots, or value system. It is incredibly exhausting to actually listen to one another and be open-minded enough to entertain the thought that we may not be right.

I was having a conservation with two Phd students the other day about how they deal with arguments. When someone won't listen to them, they use jargon to scare them into submission. Although I don't know how often they use this strategy to get their point across, it definitely upsets me that this is an established method of winning an argument, particularly in academia. If you can write the most compicated, unintelligible model, you must know what you're talking about......hmph.

At times, I feel like a chameleon when deciding how to speak to one person or another. What type of slang should I use? Should I cuss? Should I get out my biggest words and stand up straight? Communication is tough. It's essential that my true self always shines through this particular layer of makeup. Are the gobs of paint necessary to relate to others? I often think so.

FS Road 346: A Haiku by Stacy & Jane

I pulled off the road.
Young trilliums await me.
Grass dirt and the rain.

Sloshing through the mud.
I can feel the earth below.
Pulsing breathing soil.

Wind blows mind away.
Woosh woosh wish whirl woosh shhh ptch.
Kissing lush green moss.

Orange salamanders.
Mosey on by to puddle.
Merrily frolic.

Rushing water near.
Creek appears within the mist.
Elation follows.